A luck to escape from a direct subsidy school

chanpa

My son studied P.1 in a private traditional school.  I found him having problems of losing his temper, losing his belongings, not tiding up his belongings, running out of the classroom and not doing part of the examination papers.
       I thought I should find another school for him.  
       With attractive advertisement, I changed him to study P.2 in a direct subsidy school.  This school is a through-train school with two teachers a class and thirty pupils a class.  Besides, this school has a psychologist.  I guessed that my son would have better caring in this school and my son might suffer from certain kinds of disabilities.
        In the first term, no conduct was given.  But in the second term, D+ was given to my son.  At that time, he was diagnosed to suffer from a mental problem and started to take drug.  The teacher isolated him by arranging him to sit alone at the back corner of the classroom.  After hot discussion, my son was arranged to sit alone at the back of the middle classroom.  My son had no academic problem.  In the last term, he was given C in conduct.
        Before the start of P.3, I discuss his problem with the P.3 classteacher as well as submitting the letter of a Psychiatrist for sitting in front of the classroom.  Though the school had serious staff conflict in the summer of 2007, I was not aware of this and let my son study P.3.
        In P.3, the school system was changed.  There was only one classteacher in P.3 and the pupils of P.3 and P.4 were split into four groups under the care of four teachers.  Though the SGT and the classteacher informed me of two disturbing behaviour arising among my son and other classmates, they had no follow up action (just informing me).  I just took notice on these incidents.  I also gave a recommendation letter from a Psychologist of how to handle my son at school to the classteacher.
        Again, my son was given D+ in conduct in the first term.  I appealed to the head principal immediately.  I requested to have a case conference.  
        The school was very protective and just informed me of no change of conduct.  The headmistress told that the teaching staff had a prior meeting and she listed out his misbehaviour at school.  They just found justification on conduct of D+(focusing on his weakness but not his strengthens).  I was very angry.  Someone had to trigger my son such as asking his nickname.  Later, this case was known to Educational Psychologist of Education Bureau.  In the second term, the school gave him C- in conduct.  In the last term, the school gave him C+ in conduct.
        Definitively, I should change another school for my son.  I wrote the true facts to some principals.  With his good academic performance but poor conduct, only one kind and concern principal accepts him to study P.4.  My son plays the piano in grade four and gets second divison in the final Olympic Mathematics Competition against Hong Kong and Mainland students.
         I am lucky to find a suitable school to start anew for my son.

chanpa

On 19.1.2008, my wife and I saw the classteacher to collect the first term assessment report.
Oh No!  What happen!  Why D+?  I am extremely shocked.
The classteacher said," This is the decision of the conduct meeting from the headmistress and the teachers involved.  I think your son's conduct grade may be higher."
Nothing I could do but left the classroom.
I was very angry.  After all my things done in this weekend, I write a letter to the principal and the teachers committee at mid-night of 20.1.2008.
The letter was as follows.

Dear XXX, the Principal
21.1.2008
& the teachers committee,
        Appeal for amendment of my son’s conduct

Thank you for your assessment on my son during the first term.
In early September 2007, I approached for setting individual education profile (IEP) for my son, XXX, as he is diagnosed to have suffered from XXX.
The case was then known to Ms XXX, SGT.
So far, I did not hear serious problems from my son and classteacher.
However, my wife and I are shocked by his conduct D+.
There should be some measures among teachers and parents helping my son before his getting such a miserable conduct which seriously affects his personal growth, self-confidence, friendship and trust towards classmates and teachers and presentation towards outside parties.
             During this term, my son attended an intensive social group two-hour once a week run by Ms XXX, a psychologist, at XXX from October to December.
Ms XXX also wrote a letter of recommendation and suggestion to the school authority of how to deal with my son.
This letter was given to the classteacher in October.
             Once again, I appreciated Ms XXX, his classteacher, to have given much encouragement and support to my son.
Yet, did other teachers and school members know my son’s situation, characteristics of his disabilities and know how to deal with my son?
In fact, my son has disabilities that certain part of his brain is lost, resulting in a short attention span and weak mood control.
In other words, his inhibition ability is low.
The best treatments are medication and behavioural modification.
I spoke to my son at once and he told me that he was unhappy by other classmates’ noise and intentionally speaking nickname (XXX).
He then lost his temper by throwing his school bag and things and crying in the first two months.
Fortunately, he has been making some improvement since November not throwing his belongings and trying his best to hide his tears.
There should be a cause of his outburst of temper, not just viewing the end result of his losing temper, focusing on his weaknesses but not his strengthens.
Someone must involve in his conflict.
             For better handling of my son, may I request a case conference with teachers concerned to discuss his conduct, the strategies of teaching my son, IEP, to foster an effective communication channels among teachers and parents, and to enhance ways of co-operation.
In fact, my son is a straight, simple-hearted and lovely boy and listens to explanation.
              I object that his conduct is terribly given D+.
I trust your school and seek for all possible solution.
It is unfair to justify my son with a normal standard.
              For case conference arrangement, I should be grateful if you would contact me at XXX in your early convenience.

                                                           
To be continued.....

chanpa

原文章由 3lamma 於 08-7-17 15:24 發表
I believe all schools don't have enough resources for SEN students.  Even they have resources for SEN, they might spend it to hire another TA to help out the school matters, not specifically on SEN ki ...

I share with you (有苦自己知).  At first, I do not understand what happen on my son.  Is he disobey or uncontrol?
I try all methods; shouting, beating, losing temper, crying myself...  Now I learn to be patient and speak softly with steps by steps.  Importantly, I forcast the results of his action and making positive reinforcement.  I express much thanks to social workers of BGCA and Heep Hong Society, psychologists of Heep Hong Society, Project Aspire and Chinese University, two psychiatrists, his phonics teacher, Professor of Chinese University and an occupational therapist of Kowloon Hospital.  Two psychologists also write recommendation letters to explain against the conduct of D+.  There is a team of professionals working with me.  
In fact, my son gets prizes of Mandarin, piano and Mathematics outside for this miserable school.  Yet, this miserable school posts the prizes on its website.  How many prizes the school gets.  In fact, it is the effort of all parents but not the school itself.   

When I lose my temper, I try to control myself.  I speak to myself that I am the only one in the world to help my son.

chanpa

In the morning of 21.1.2008, I gave the appeal letter to the head principal.  The classteacher did not know the progress.  In late January 2008, this head principal gave me the interim reply.
In February 2008, a case conference was held.  At first, I expected those in the conduct meeting would appear.  At mid-night before the case conference, I prepared the information of how to handle my son's disabilities.  I am open-minded to share and just want to find a solution.
The case conference was full of fire and started at 3:30pm.  The headmistress of the primary section chaired the meeting.  The secretary, SGT, the classteacher, 輔導主任, my wife and I attended the meeting.  The headmistress said that the case conference would be ended at 4:00pm as the headmistress and teacher staff would have another meeting at 4:00pm.  The headmistress did not respect us because both of us took a leave for this meeting.
In the meeting, the headmistress first pointed that SGT and the classteacher had phoned to us as the communication channel.  After that, the headmistress sounded that the teaching staff had a prior meeting and listed out my son's misbehaviour one by one as reported by other teachers.  I consider this was minor such as walking away in the PE lesson.  The most important two incidents were as follows.
1) my son screamed in the classroom and other classmates screamed back.  My son said that the classroom was noisy.  The teacher and other classmates said that there was no loud noise.  Might my son be sensitive?  The classteacher considered that the classmates and my son played together in the later stage.  
2) My son lost his temper and used a ball pen to draw on his school bag.  Every part of the school bag was drawn with lines.  I guess that my son needed at least fifteen minutes to do such behaviour on all the surface of the school bag.  SGT did not stop my son drawing on the school bag but allowed him to continue to draw.  Why did not SGT stop my son's behaviour but SGT just let him destroy the school bag?  My son told me that the student who ranked the first in next class said the nickname of my son.  My son lost temper as he thought that such a good student also said nickname on him.
Lastly, the headmistress concluded that D+ was the final decision without amendment.  I exploded and was very angry.  I suggested that you should give D+ with the explanation of my son's disabilities.  This headmistress rejected as it was 個人私穩.
Then I also suggested to report the range of conduct that those who involved in the conflict.  The headmistress replied that she had dealed with these students.
At this moment, I was very angry and wrote on my paper that 閉門做車, 離晒譜, 岐視 to calm me down.  
The classteacher kept silent.
The headmistress instructed the classteacher to write down what she talked with me. (白紙黑字 black and white)
輔導主任 reported that she found my son could control himself despite his disability.  This woman was so powerful that she opposed the opinion of psychiatrist and psychologist.
SGT said "Is D+ so important?"
At 4:00pm, the headmistress claimed to have another meeting with other teaching staff.  They did not respect us who wanted a solution of helping my son.  They left the conference room, leaving the classteacher to talk with us.  SGT came to help the classteacher and the classteacher went out.  SGT talked for a while and left.  We waited until about 6:00pm and SGT came to tell us that the headmistress and teaching staff would not see us today.  I insisted on having another meeting two weeks later.  SGT promised and we left school.
Absolutely, my son needed to change another school as this school was not loving, not supportive and not 包容 but rather fault finding to justify their wrongdoing.

I try to be calm down and think my action plan......

chanpa

My son does not study at HKUAPS.

多謝大家支持，大家的眼睛是雪亮的。

chanpa

Hi Clmom

全中。當日，參加了簡報會，被吸引了。
結果下錯注，輸得很慘，害了兒子。

按語：假、大、空，回頭是岸。

chanpa

Hi every mums

I remembered that the Headmistress considered that A grade was excellent, B grade was good, C grade was satisfactory and D grade meant needed improvement in the appeal meeting.

The Headmistress considered that my son's conduct was not satisfactory but he needed improvement.  Therefore, she gave him grade D+ in conduct.

I thought she was crazy and 無料 to handle my son.  A, A-, B+, B, B-, C+, C,and C- also needed improvement.  She cannot make a positive way to look at my son but is very defensive to find faults on my son.

Furthermore, my son got prizes on Mandarin and Mathematics in the name of the school.  The school posted these on its website which seemed that the school trained him.  In fact, I employed a private Mandarin teacher for my son and attended twenty hours training course outside for Mathematics.  Why did not the school add conduct marks for my son (為校爭光 )?

I shall take action to the school and the running organisation to 還 亞仔公道.

Thank you for all support and concern in this issue.

chanpa

原文章由 C.F. 於 08-8-5 03:16 發表
Dear Chanpa,


           I knew how you feel, I think your son was in the same class with my kid .  
            At the beginning in grade 2 when the school was newly started.  I'd heard about your s ...

Dear CF

          Don't worry about your kid.  I think that those chosen by the previous chief principal are good students who had special talents/potentials.

          I experienced that 活動在學校, 教學在家中。  But youhave no guideline at home.  So you have to teach your kid at home i.e. to train him to be traditional one.  

          All the school promise is empty. (自求多福)  Don't you see that there is a psychologist, a social worker, two teachers in a class but so called mentor only in this year? (有的像賣仔) With some unknown/hidden political reasons, the psychologist, who had serious conflict with the primary headmistress in 2007, was transferred to the secondary school and he never took a notice on the primary school students in this year.  Previously, the psychologist held good parent lectures but now the parent lectures were contracted out.  This psychologist was also resigned this year and the school employed a new psychologist.

           I suggest that your kid should do extra exercises for future use/preparation.  I teach my son with the guidelines of the book, 孩子的成功來自媽媽 1%的改變, 張炳惠博士著。  It teaches how to make the son study on a table and to increase the study time.  In other words, it teaches the son to increase his attention span.  

           In the classroom, the study atmosphere is not good.  So you should train your son by yourself.  The other class XB is much worse than XA.  XB is more confused(亂).  You can see in the video for 觀課.  In addition, many teachers left the school this year, which  brought the continuity problem.

           I heard from a parent that a P.6 student coming from a traditional primary school studied in F.1 in this school.  This student became more relax in F.1 and now he was promoted to F.2.  How can this student makes a competition with outside students when sitting for public examination?  Secondly, I heard another direct subsidy school requests many not up-to-standard students to repeat.  Thirdly, I heard that a parent was disappointed to the book list of the secondary school as the books are easy.   

          Work hard for your kid. (1%聰明, 99%勤力, 沒有不勞而獲)  The school said that the school has taught the students all at school and the parents just played with the students at home.  Don't worry about the revision.  (邊有禁 數)  
          We support all together.  If you have any problem/question, please PM me and I shall call you back.

chanpa

Dear all kind baby-kingdom ma,

My son starts the new P.4 in a traditional school.  He has one Chinese dictation and one English dictation in each learning cycle.  Each dictation is equal to the total amount of the previous DSS at least three months.  My son now got good marks in dictations and I am busy at closely monitoring his study.  In September, he got a Chinese assessment and a Mathematics assessment.  Luckily, he passed them.  I am confident that he will be better later.  He is now working hard.  In the past one month, I do not receive any complaint from the school whose classmates and teachers are good.  The students there pay much effort on study but not paying trick on other students.  My son sounds that he loves this school very much and does not lose his temper so far.  

What happened after the first case conference after Chinese New Year 08.  The DSS student guidance teacher (SGT) referred my son to the Educational Psychologist of Education Bureau but not his so called educational psychologist in DSS.  But it was too late.  The Educational Psychologist of Educational Bureau interviewed with me, my wife and SGT to collect the basic information.  Then, a second case conference with English teacher, Mathematics teacher, SGT, Educational Psychologist, Educational Psychologist student, two senior staff of Educational Bureau, my wife and I was held.  In fact, after the first meeting with Educational Psychologist, I request the assistance of Educational Bureau for the change of school.  After finishing the final examination in July, a third case conference was held before summer holiday.  This was just a round up meeting with the classteacher, Mathematics teacher, SGT, Educational Psychologist, my wife and I.  Where is the headmistress and the female discipline master?  Are they scared?  Do they avoid seeing us for the bad conduct?  Before that, I did not pay the school deposit for the next school year.  I have strong desire to leave this evil DSS no matter where my son goes to study.

After March, this is only SGT to handle the case.  I receive no concern from the chief Principal, headmistress and female discipline master.  When my wife and I met them in the school, the headmistress and this female discipline master just walked away. (如同陌路人)  We were just transparent.  I write them for an appeal.  Yet, the school authority is very scared and does not write back to me with a good reason.   

In this year, this DSS receives no new student in P.4.  Totally, three students of previous 3A, including a student whose parent was a member of Parent Teacher Association, left the school and one repeated.  Of course, this parent knows more school information than me.  It is understandable why this parent chooses to leave this school.  The last student left DSS with his younger sibling.

I read from a newspaper last week and in the website.  A parent wrote to the newspaper to praise this DSS and many good comments were posted in the internet.  But this is only P.1 parent but not P.2, P.3, P.4 and P.5.  Where are these parents?  Do P.1 parents know the outside primary standard?  If the parents lastly sent their kids to study abroad, OK you stay at DSS.  Otherwise, you should think carefully.  (不做白老鼠) Once you start your child in this DSS, it is very difficulty to get out of this DSS.  你想逃，你要有好身手。

This is the end of a sad story of a boy with special learning difficulties.  

Thank you for those reading my messages and those support my son and I.

chanpa

原帖由 mattsmum 於 08-10-5 12:38 發表
this book may be useful for you.

Boys Adrift浮萍男孩：發現男生缺乏動機的因素，再造獨立負責的男兒本色

男孩的成長需要適當的教育與引導
──洪蘭

以前我做學生時，班上沒有一個同學是過動或注意力缺失，現在幾乎每 ...

I have bought this book but I am busy at teaching my son as he has assessments in October and examination in November.  He usually has English and Chinese dictations once a week.  Fortunately, he adjusts well in the school.  At least, I receive no complaint from the school.

chanpa

This week, my son gets merit on grade four piano examination.  I am very happy as he passed grade two piano examination in last time.  I think he will do better if he can play more slowly.  I support and encourage him to practise the piano.  Through the piano training, he learns to pay attention and slows down his motion.  But it takes time to practise.

This Saturday, he will sit for Mandarin examination of GAPSK.  I hope he will have satisfactory results.

I am glad that the teachers do not call me in the past two months.  I think the teacher's tolerance and classmates' acceptance are very important.  My son plays chess in the recess time and no one calls his nickname.  Next week, he will have the mid-term examination.  A war is coming.

Sometimes, he loses his temper because of his rigid and stubborn thinking.  I try to comprise and share with him.

chanpa

原帖由 mattsmum 於 08-10-9 13:47 發表
"仇恨 is not necessary.  放過別人, 放過自己"

do we also say this to 雷曼苦主?

if money is important, so is children's feeling.

It may be called as 雷曼DSS.  (抵押品是一張白紙，甚麼都沒有。)  DSS promises everything but does little thing or nothing.  As time passes by, you will see her real picture.

On 9.11.2008, I saw a girl, who ranked the first in last P.3 of that DSS, when my son attended GAPSK examination (港澳地區中小學普通話水平考試).  Surely, this examination is extra for my son and this girl.

This girl works hard and studies more than the DSS requirement.  ie by self-learning as well as her parents support.

No matter what your student studies, your student should study hard.  (自強不息，挑戰自己)

School is only supplementary.  The parents are really the children's life teacher.

chanpa

原帖由 Charlotte_mom 於 08-11-10 10:40 發表

學琴有用嗎? 我細仔集中力非常差, 其實我覺得佢音樂感唔錯的, 家姐彈既歌佢可以唱返晒出黎(唔係兒歌, 係3級歌eg卡門果d), 我地玩, 教佢彈"登登登燉"(命運交響曲頭4個音, 雙手彈), 佢好快就識自己彈
可能個天係公平吧 ...

My son learnt to play the piano at K.2.  In P.1, he passed grade two.  In fact, it is quite boring to play the examination songs and scales.  Sometimes, he does not like to play and plays in very fast on his own way.  Setting the regular time schedule and playing with his favourite song will help him playing the piano more.  Just encourage him to play the piano slowly first.  Increasing the practising time a little and a little.  Furthermore, you can encourage him to sit for open competition for knowing other people's standard.

Keep going and making it become his habit where he gets satisfaction.  The son has to work hard before his success.  No free lunch for success.  Good intelligence is helpful in the junior class while he has to work hard in the senior class starting from P.3.  For example, a gifted child does not study Chinese History and how can he get distinction in this subject.  One way is to work hard.  Don't protect the child or don't spoil the child.  The child has to learn from failure for success.  When the parents think that the child cannot do this or that, this child of course cannot do this or that.

chanpa

終於考完試，希望他能有好成績。
但可能是奢望，因他在舊校渾渾噩噩。

不要多想，努力向前；接納、鼓勵、找長處、忍讓。

chanpa

My son just finished the writing test last Saturday and oral test today.

GAPSK is divided into two parts:
-writing test
-oral test

You can visit www.gapak.org and click 課程夥伴 to find some information of a tutorial centre.

chanpa

You can buy three books, 練習及模擬試題, 應試指南, 實戰練習 by 漢語出版 for GAPSK.

chanpa

原帖由 Charlotte_mom 於 08-11-16 13:50 發表
thanks indeed!
我女學琴我都無點迫佢的, 我同佢講, 總之pass到, 下次老師教新野就得了(次次repeat佢都悶啦.....)比賽考試, 等時機成熟至講啦(係, 練考試真係悶到喊)

...

First, you encourage your daughter to play the piano slowly by one hand and then both hands.

In the coming music festival, my son will sit for grade five piano solo.  In fact, it is easy for him to play grade four song or even grade three song so as to get the prize.  My point is to encourage him to fight for higher level (向上心) and let him see other's presentation.  Of course, I don't push him.  I encourage him to play five times by right hand slowly and then five times by left hand slowly.  After that, he asked for play for one time with both hands.

chanpa

Dear all BK mums,

After three-month P.4 study, my son gets grade B in conduct in the first term and improves a lot.  He tells me he sometimes has conflict with a boy but he tries to tolerate.  If he cannot tolerate, he will cry without action.  This may be due to his weak social skills.

Regarding his academic results, he gets grade C in Chinese and English, B in General Studies and A in Mathematics.  I am very satisfied with this results and am very thankful to the headmaster and teachers to give him a chance.

Thank you to all supportive mums.

chanpa

Dear all BK mums,

My son gets satiisfactory results in GAPSK against other P.5 and P.6 students.  I think he is nearly the youngest candidate in this examination.

Furthermore, he got 二等獎 at olympics mathematics.  He attended the pre-examination course twelve hours in total two months ago and attended the olympics mathematics in January 2009 without revision.  But, he has difficulty in learning in some aspects and social relationship.

This DSS missed a high function pupil with special learning difficulties.  Yet, this DSS doesn't know how to deal with him, just fault finding and giving conduct D+ instead.  

I observe that there are many people speaking of how good the previous DSS is.  In fact, they may probably come from the DSS directly.  (自問自答) Don't believe them. (很容易中招)  Don't you see some pupils from G2 to G5 speaking of how they are in DSS in comparison with outside students?  For those getting offers in this DSS in 2009, they should think carefully.  All students are directly promoted to the secondary school (沒有公開派位，直上直資中學，沒有其他選擇。)

Lastly, I will appear on TV in coming soon.

chanpa

原帖由 swmami 於 09-1-21 03:52 發表
Chanpa - BTW, when will you appear on TV?  Which channel?

Coming soon in near future.