英華生打機被責跳樓死

WYmom

Just watch the movie "小孩不笨2", talking about a 15 year old boy and his younger brother, their parents are typical Chinese, always busy, no time to listen to kids, only ask them to study hard, stop them doing what they like (ICQ, talking on phone), scold them no matter what they do...  his school also is typical traditional school, use punishment method, follow rules strictly, punish the kids publicly to make hime feel shameful...the boy finally joins those gangs to steal, rob ...

Have seen so many such stories... and so many kids just "jump" to end this... is it really so difficult to understand and communicate with our teenage kids????

Is it really "沒有教不會的孩子, 只有不會教的父母?"  Why parents scold instead of praise the kids more and more when they grow up?  I really feel that the relationship with teenage kids is becoming more and more "tense", the kids become more and more "silent" when they grow up, so this leads to so many tragedies ultimately! :cry:

WYmom

Wendypykwok 寫道:
究竟 e+應該點教D小朋友呢，鬧得多又話hurt 到佢D自尊心，唔鬧又覺很好似縱容佢地，如今做父母就真係難 !

    

Yes, it's so difficult!  Now I try to build better "friendship" with my teenage girl, so that she won't avoid telling me her school life and her friends.  If we are not showing that we are "teaching" them but instead we are supporting them all the time, I believe the kids will trust their parents more and ask for help to overcome their problems. Hope this works!

WYmom

Wendypykwok 寫道:
好多時仔仔話我地D大人唔明白佢地細路仔D想法,其實我好多時都真係幾唔明白，點解溫習總要人叫，叫佢唔好時時打機，佢又覺得你呢樣唔俾個樣唔俾，又唔開心，真係好煩

Yes, I feel the same too!  I think the kids just don't understand why they have to study all the time!  They feel happier to play games, so they will of course do what they really like!  So if we want them to study, they must have the interest to do so first!

My daughter also does not like studying, but she likes reading a lot (not textbooks la of course), so we encourage her to borrow books of different topics to read.  Now she begins to like reading history stories.

WYmom

eviepa 寫道:
1. 從前父母通常有數名子女，注意力分散，要罵的話也沒時間罵那麼久。

2. 從前孩子大都有出街的自由，所以無論中在家受到甚麼的對待，總有街外可作避難所，總有四方友好的認同，總可以暫時忘記痛楚，鬱結的心情也可以藉著遊戲宣泄出來，回家後可以怨氣全消。反觀今日，家家戶戶篷門深鎖，大有為的家長恨鐵不成鋼，對著孩子束手無策訴諸責罵時便有如籠牢困獸鬥，孩子的怨氣難以宣泄，日子久了，悲觀的情緒油然而生，悲劇便比以前容易發生。

Eviepa

Quite agree with pt 1, in our generation, we usually have many brothers and sisters, parents will scold and beat one by one, so we cried together and then play together again after some time.  Now most families use all energies to supervise only 1 to 2 kids, so the pressure on the kid is much much higher!!

Besides, kids like to lock themselves in the virtual world more than going out now!

In the past, even we are just F5 graduates, we can survive quite well with a low end job, yet now there is no more such a way out.  F5 graduates cannot find a decent job with good aspects.  So expectation of parents become higher and higher and pressure on the kids also increase to much higher level.